My husband likes anal sex and for me it's very painful. I know there are lubricants designed to numb the pain but don't they numb both sides? Is there anything that I can do to help ease this problem to make it something both sides can enjoy?
Solution:
All good advice, try a few more times but have an out clause so in time if nothing helps he will give it up.
But really it can be a really great experience if done correctly.
First question is how big is he? If he's big or thick it might never happen.
The thing is some people enjoy the pain. In extremely heightened sexual states pain becomes pleasure, the body chemistry and brain changes. Pain causes endorphins and that can make a more pleasurable feeling. For instance, working out can be painful but you get this runner high from it once you past a certain point.
This is going to take a few times and graduate slowly step by step. Not even in the same week, maybe once a week or every other week, he has to be patience.
So, relax, have a few glasses of wine. Have him give you a full body massage with oil. Have him perform some great oral on you including some anal penetration with a well lubed finger. Just have him insert it and not anything else. That will get you used to having an object in there. Graduate to a small anal plug, well lubed it will stay in by it's self. Have him use a vibrator on you or rabbit while doing this after the oral.
After a few times of this and once you have learned to relax your anal sphincter muscles and are used to having something in there he can proceed to using a finger or two in you anus but with the in and out movement. You can also use a dildo now that is approximately his size or less with the in and out motions, but slowly and well lubed.
The next step is to insert his penis when you are fully comfortable and just leave it in their while he plays with you, erogenous zones like breasts, nipples, clit and even uses the vibrator on you clit.
Then it time for you to hold the vibrator on your clitoris while he slowly does the in/out thing, slowly until you are used to it.
Once you have gotten to that point it's time to go for it full out. If you can't get to that point it will never happen, if you do by that time you would be used to it and even if it's not number one on your list all the other things like massages, rabbit's and vibrators maybe even a little B&D thrown in might make up for it. Then again he may unleash something inside of you that makes you say "fuck my ass, pound it baby, ram it hard in me", it has happened, believe me.
But always use an enema to clear your bowels first and be careful anything you eat that day isn't something that makes you have any type of intestinal problems.
If you cannot get to that point but have given it a real try, make a deal with him. You will let him fuck your ass if he lets you take a similar sized dildo and fucks his with it, it's only fair you know. He might get into too, you never know. Some men love a vibrator in there too. It doesn't mean he's gay believe it or not.
But really it can be a really great experience if done correctly.
First question is how big is he? If he's big or thick it might never happen.
The thing is some people enjoy the pain. In extremely heightened sexual states pain becomes pleasure, the body chemistry and brain changes. Pain causes endorphins and that can make a more pleasurable feeling. For instance, working out can be painful but you get this runner high from it once you past a certain point.
This is going to take a few times and graduate slowly step by step. Not even in the same week, maybe once a week or every other week, he has to be patience.
So, relax, have a few glasses of wine. Have him give you a full body massage with oil. Have him perform some great oral on you including some anal penetration with a well lubed finger. Just have him insert it and not anything else. That will get you used to having an object in there. Graduate to a small anal plug, well lubed it will stay in by it's self. Have him use a vibrator on you or rabbit while doing this after the oral.
After a few times of this and once you have learned to relax your anal sphincter muscles and are used to having something in there he can proceed to using a finger or two in you anus but with the in and out movement. You can also use a dildo now that is approximately his size or less with the in and out motions, but slowly and well lubed.
The next step is to insert his penis when you are fully comfortable and just leave it in their while he plays with you, erogenous zones like breasts, nipples, clit and even uses the vibrator on you clit.
Then it time for you to hold the vibrator on your clitoris while he slowly does the in/out thing, slowly until you are used to it.
Once you have gotten to that point it's time to go for it full out. If you can't get to that point it will never happen, if you do by that time you would be used to it and even if it's not number one on your list all the other things like massages, rabbit's and vibrators maybe even a little B&D thrown in might make up for it. Then again he may unleash something inside of you that makes you say "fuck my ass, pound it baby, ram it hard in me", it has happened, believe me.
But always use an enema to clear your bowels first and be careful anything you eat that day isn't something that makes you have any type of intestinal problems.
If you cannot get to that point but have given it a real try, make a deal with him. You will let him fuck your ass if he lets you take a similar sized dildo and fucks his with it, it's only fair you know. He might get into too, you never know. Some men love a vibrator in there too. It doesn't mean he's gay believe it or not.
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